Day 221

Does anyone feel like they don't see me anymore?  I'm sorry about that.  I can't tell you how many people tell me I look tired which is never a good thing.  I am tired.  Those new minerals I'm taking make it so that I don't crash during the day which gives me more stamina to get things done, but it also makes me wonder if I truly am getting enough rest.  I still think I am being I am being lifted and carried.  I gave my two weeks notice for the filing job.  There's just no way.  I left at 7 am last Thursday, worked at the new job until 3:30, trained until 4:30, went straight to the doctor job until 8 and then ran to file until 10:30 pm.  Certifiable, that's what it is.  And that's my temple night which is the most important thing anyway.  I went on Wednesday instead and it just wasn't quite the same.  There is NO WAY I could have done this even a few months ago.  Luckily, the filing job will end Tuesday and that will free up three hours. 

It isn't a bad thing for me to get a taste of what T experienced.  I come home and he has dinner made and things straightened up.  Sometimes he doesn't get to it and that can be overwhelming.  But I will be stuck in traffic and call him to start dinner preparation.  Today I had RS visits for two and half hours and he had my zucchini soup ready when I got home.  It's just been good for me and maybe for him too?  I can't speak for him, but I've been proud of him for keeping his spirits up.  I know it must be hell in a lot of ways.  I think he's enjoyed being with the kids.  It's been fun, surreal, scary, peaceful, everything, having all of us home all this summer.  He lost his job just as C was ending his last school year.  And now C will begin again next Monday.  Full circle.

C met his teacher Friday.  He already knows her because she was his reading teacher in second grade and she remembers him really well for getting some of the highest reading scores at the school.  He seemed happy that she will be his teacher and I PRAY that this year will be better.  Seriously.  You may find me on my knees all day every day praying for this.  Fifth grade.  He will do great.  I'm just putting it out there.  He will do great.