I began today on my knees, talking out loud barely stopping for breath, let alone letting God get a word in edgewise. I prayed that I would love well today. Love better than I usually do. And most especially my husband and children. That it would come to me like second nature, instead of croaking and groaning from my insides.
Isn't is funny how when we pray for the opportunities to show we will act and not just talk a good talk, He gives it to us? I prayed for this and oh, did I get the opportunity.
The news that my friend Ch lost her baby at over six months along this morning, the sob that burst from my own lips as the rawness of Friday's Connecticut tragedy still burned. I didn't stop for a hairbrush, for makeup, I don't think I was wearing socks, I dropped things and ran to her arms. There's her whole family, inlaws, a moment of family, and I didn't let myself feel awkward, just that love I prayed for. We wept together and...there are no words. When I remember my life, I want to remember I ran to her today. I thought that was to be it, at least for today.
I was wrong. And this one I can't talk about yet because oh how my prayer was answered and in the past as I got this same news, I have not always handled it with the love I prayed today, this very day to have. If I had not felt prompted, humbled today to pray for this, I don't know what would have happened in my reaction, especially in this second moment.
For the second time, I had my arms around a loved one as they wept. This one bears down on my shoulders, this one I can't weep about yet, I must remain strong.
Oh, and the poem's almost done. I will make my deadline. And I will keep praying to love well.
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